An impossible job description

I was reading a book last week (“The Work/Parent Switch” by Anita Cleare) and a sentence really struck a chord with me: that as parents “we have written ourselves an impossible job description”.

Meaning that as well as holding down a job and trying to build our careers, we are also trying to do everything we can to make sure our children are happy and set up for success, that their lives are full of opportunities we never had….

Meaning that there is an awful lot of organising and logistics to sort out, things to remember, plan for, prepare, pay for, be responsible for…

Meaning that we often feel swamped by this unending list of family admin, but we keep going because without it, family life would fall over…

Meaning that instead, we fall over. We’re exhausted by the emotional and mental labour that goes into keeping everyone around us happy…

Meaning that we risk missing the point. Families are made up of relationships, not tasks. Parenting is not a to-do list. It’s about being in the moment with our children. Being, not doing. And sometimes doing nothing is everything.       

Going back to that job description: what if we were to focus instead on the wider purpose of our role as parents, rather than our parenting to-do-list? What would our job description look like then? And how much more energised and fulfilled might we feel?